Football Joke - Part 8 ( Liverpool 1 - 6 Man Utd )

Manchester United's march towards the Premiership title continued today with a stunning display at Old Trafford. The Super Reds went ahead just before the kick-off when Giggs was sent away down the left wing. His cross was handled on the half way line by a Liverpool defender and a penalty was awarded for this cynical foul. Wayne Rooney stepped up to slot the ball home for United's 33rd penalty of the season. It was no more than United deserved. 


The 15th minute saw the Super-Smashing Reds go two up after Steven Gerrard was penalised for coughing just outside the area. Luis Nani's resultant free kick was slightly miss-hit, but even if the keeper was not being pinned to the floor by Phil Jones, he would not have saved it. 2-0. It was no more than United deserved. 

The 21st minute saw more trouble for Liverpool when Steven Gerrard was sent-off for enquiring about the referee's Man United shirt. However two minutes after the interval Liverpool struck back after an amazing piece of good fortune. The referee's assistant could only parry Maxi Rodriguz' shot and Luiz Suarez thumped the ball home. Confusion reigned for 10 minutes as the entire Manchester United squad surrounded the referee, arguing that the referee's assistant had been fouled 15 minutes earlier. The referee grudgingly had to give the goal even though he racked his brain for a reason to disallow it. 

Alex Ferguson was furious and rushed down from his seat in the stand to the dugout, Fortunately, things settled down again as Hernandez took a long-range shot, which deflected off the corner flag but had clearly crossed the line, 3-1. It was no more than United deserved. 

Wayne Rooney slotted home number 4 from the penalty spot after Agger went down with a broken leg. Fortunately Valencia was nearby when it happened and, after running 50 yards, he was able to bring the incident to the referee's attention. Unfazed by Aggers's cynical tactics, protruding bone and spraying blood, the referee sent him off for diving (and time wasting) and awarded United the penalty. Ryan Giggs cheekily chipped the ball over the keeper and the crossbar, but the referee decided that it was a goal, because based on past records, Ryan Giggs rarely missed. 

When the final whistle went after 33 minutes of injury time, Liverpool traipsed off with their heads low, having been taught a footballing lesson by what is by far the greatest team the World has ever seen. As the losers hit the showers, a superb flowing movement by United culminated with a fine diving header by Alex Ferguson and it was 5-1. However the referee decided that it was such a good goal, it should count double. 

6-1 then - and it was no more than United deserved.